Facebook is really making the news lately – and not just for its new Timeline format. A recent study shows that nearly one-third of today’s divorces have something or another to do with Facebook. Yikes. However startling that sounds, people don’t seem to be too startled. As a matter of fact, it seems that Facebook transgressions are so much the norm that it is not at all uncommon to cite Facebook as a “relationship killer,” or to use Facebook posts as court evidence in divorce and custody battles. So, what is it about Facebook that is endangering today’s marriages? And, more importantly, is Facebook driving you closer to divorce? Here are some things to consider:
The culprits: In the examples in which Facebook is named as a divorce catalyst, there are some common themes. Namely, Facebook seems to “cause trouble” in three major ways: people use the social networking platform to conduct inappropriate relations with romantic interests outside of the relationship, they post damaging information about their exes, and their friends monitor and report (sometimes inaccurately) on spousal behavior.
The indications: If you really want to know how Facebook is affecting your relationship, pay attention to the things you and your spouse argue about. How often does Facebook come up? If you seem to be spending a lot of time defending your actions on Facebook, or are often compelled to question your spouse’s Facebook behavior, then it’s time to make some real changes. If the marriage is important enough to both of you, then it is a good idea to take Facebook out of the picture altogether, until you can get to the bottom of the real issue (and you can be sure the real issue isn’t Facebook, itself).
The real blame: While it’s clear that Facebook presents people with opportunities to damage their relationships, it cannot be said that Facebook actually causes divorce. The real blame needs to rest on the shoulders of those who misbehave on Facebook. As many people are quick to point out, a cheater is going to find a way to cheat – Facebook or not. Therefore, it is your actions that drive you to divorce – not Facebook.
It’s obvious that Facebook is affecting the way we interact with other people, and that it inevitably will affect the quality of our relationships. That could be a good or bad thing, depending on what you make of it. Remember that Facebook does not have the power to destroy your marriage . . . but it can definitely make it easier for you to destroy it.
About the Author: Luciana Baugess is an EKG specialist and a student counselor who recommends ekgtechniciantraining.net to those looking into this career field. While she enjoys social media sites, she draws a fine line when it comes to the role these sites play in her relationships.